Resolutions and Solutions

Growing up

It’s not easy making the transition from childhood to adulthood. Thus the turbulent teen years. For some it’s harder than others.

I’ve reached the point in my life where I’m grown up enough to want to take some friends by the shoulders and scream: Stop being such a melodramatic child. You are no longer 13 years old. AAAH!

Have you ever felt like that? I mean, by the time you reach 30 you really have lost the right to act like a child. I know psychologists will talk about the New Childhood, and Second Childhood. I got top characters on my thesis about how media and pop-culture are encouraging children to grow up sooner while at the same time letting adults take responsibility later. But 30 years is old enough to understand that you don’t get to stomp your feet and carry on just because you don’t get your way.

I know breaking up is hard to do. Yes, I’ve heard the song too. But still, not every guy you meet can be The One. And if they all run away after hearing how in love you are with them after only a week, maybe you need to change your strategy.

That said, here’s a little dating advice for those of you who might need it.

1. Show up on time. Call if you’re going to be late for whatever reason. No, a first date running long is not a good enough excuse.

2. Unless you have known the person for years, a first date is not the right time to express your undying love and devotion.

3. Most people over the age of 3 like to order for themselves while out at a restaurant. Especially when on a date.

4. Unless your name is Joey Tribiani, do not eat your date’s food.

5. Getting a kiss at the end of the night is not a given, it is something you have to deserve. You do not deserve this if you pinch her ass while giving the kiss.

That wasn’t so bad, huh?